It was a scorcher of a day.
My friends and I were sprawled out on the hot plastic mats next to the track behind our high-school.
Classes were out for the day but practice hadn’t started yet.
We splayed on our backs, our heads almost touching and stared up at the Colorado blue sky.
There wasn’t a cloud in sight
“Do you have any girl crushes?” M casually drawled.
I could always be honest with friends back then,
the kind of friendships that last through fire.
Even then I made no distinction on that issue.
I was never attracted to women.
But I admired them, was inspired by them…
when Nikki Giovanni smiled at me as a teen, my cheeks got very hot, my nerves got tangled, and I lost every word I’d ever learned.
What is that, if not a crush. and what is a crush if not dazzling admiration.
I told them who my girl crush was,”But you cannot tell her.” My glare was not as ferocious back then, but i tried.
“She’s so beautiful, and talented. I think she’ll be better than me at pole vault….but mostly she is kind and sweet. SO kind. I wish I could be as kind as her…”
“You are” my friends had chimed in. Because friends know what you need to hear.
I can fully admit that right now my girl crush-in magazine form– is Loam.
It’s just lush, and gorgeous and reads like a dream, all fluid and familiar.
It vibes at an atmospheric frequency and I’m currently crushing hard.